Kanani in the Pool - Sex Stories

Kanani in the Pool

... that's the end of it. Okay?"

I nodded. I must have looked sad because she said, "You were wonderful, you know. You're going to make some girl very happy someday."

"But not you."

She nodded back to me. "Right. Not me."

I kissed her again; she let me kiss her. But she didn't really kiss me back.

"See you next week for TV?" she asked.

I nodded and left.

I got my shorts and T-shirt, and walked home.

When I came back next week, the sofa in the TV room had a covering over it.

*****

Let's wrap this up. In June we all graduated. Jake and Samantha went on to UCLA. I went to Cal (Berkeley). We never got together again once we graduated and went our separate ways. Kanani and John got divorced. The house was sold.

The end.

I heard later that Kanani got remarried. Sam messaged me on FB that Kanani ended up being married two more times before she found what she was looking for. John died a few years ago; he never remarried. Jake disappeared; he fucking fell off the face of the earth. I'm sure I could find him if I tried, but why try?

What about Sam? She married a college football player, an Offensive Lineman. They have three kids and live in Florida. I'm sure they're very happy together.

The story may be over but there are still loose ends, though. I can't stop thinking about John and Kanani, and their marriage. Why did they get divorced after nearly twenty years of being together? Why did they choose that exact time to announce their divorce to ...

... their kids? Does the timing seem as weird to you as it does to me?

Those questions have haunted me for 30 years. My therapist says I'm perseverating. I'm still anxious about stuff that happened when I was still a teenager. Maybe I am. But still—

The Carlson family welcomed me into their home. They adopted me, to some extent. They let me be a part of their family at a time in my life when I effectively had no family. The opened their front door and their arms to me. They gave me a sanctuary when I needed one.

How did I repay that gracious hospitality?

I repaid it by fucking John's wife. By fucking Jake and Samantha's mom. That's how I repaid their warmth and generosity.

I fucking abused what they gave me.

Yes, yes. It was consensual. Kanani didn't have to do what she did. It wasn't all me: she was wrong as well. I get that.

ButI was the asshole here.I was the one who took advantage. Thank God I didn't screw Samantha as well—because that would have been even worse. Me screwing Samantha would have been like me screwing my own sister. Maybe she understood that, even if I didn't.

I was The Asshole. I committed adultery with Kanani. I was the one who fucked another man's wife.

The Carlsons deserved so much better from me!

I have learned to live with what I did. I have been to therapy and I have learned to forgive myself.

But what I cannot forgive myself for is the thought that maybe—just maybe—John and Kanani could have salvaged their marriage. Maybe ...