Bertie gets laid at last - Sex Stories

Bertie gets laid at last

... anatonomy never was my strongest subject, now trains that’s a subject,” I explained.

“Oh for gods sake, you do know ladies have a front bottom as well as a back one,” she asked.

“Actually no,” I admitted, “Is that in front or behind your willy?”

“No Bertie, I don’t have a willy, ladies don’t have willies, surely you know that?” she queried.

“So that’s why you sit down to pee is it?” I asked.

“Not quite we have a separate pee hole,” Dotty confessed.

Quite suddenly the Vicar and his wife who were sharing the compartment with us stood up and left muttering darkly.

I quite failed to realise they were actually sharing with us, as I was so interested in Dotty’s story.

Anyway long story short the dashed Vicar fellow dobbed us in and the ticket inspector descended, I explained I bought her the wrong ticket and slipped him five quid to avoid the ten bob fine.

We were nearly at Acton West Junction before we got back to talking, and then I had to get the engine numbers at Acton yard, Old Oak and Ranelagh Bridge so anatomy sort of got put on the back burner.

“So how does this front bottom thing work?” I asked as we waited at the ticket barrier.

Do you know some vicious old biddy immediately assaulted me with her umbrella for absolutely no reason.

“Bertie keep your voice down,” Dotty said, “If you get me a Taxi to Garmin Street I’ll tell you.”

Well I was not that interested truth to tell, but I felt I should be a gentleman and see Dotty safe to ...

... her destination so I dutifully found us a taxicab and allowed Dotty to issue directions.

“Bertie surely you know ladies have a front bottom instead of a willy?” she asked.

“News to me,” I admitted, “Obviously they have titties and smaller brains than men, and are weaker and smaller and not as clever, but I never gave the willy thing a single thought.”

“Well they do,” Dotty insisted.

“Fair enough, do they pooh through both?” I asked.

“No babies come out of the front one,” she explained.

“Crikey, I thought the stalk brought them,” I countered.

“The stalk puts babies there,” she continued, “The Willy stalk.”

“Gosh,” I gasped, “Babies and pee.”

“No pee is separate, separate hole,” she said patiently, “Surely you knew this?”

“No, total blank,” I admitted, “No girlies at Eton and Mother forbade me to play with girls in any case, I think I will have to look this up in my encyclopedia.”

“Yes I suppose you will,” Dotty replied.

“So what is this Virginity thingy,” I enquired.

“It’s a thing to keep the cold out until I have a willy go up inside me to make a baby,” she explained patiently.

“Ghastly things babies,” I ventured, “Mother says I was ghastly and having me was the biggest mistake she and Daddy ever made.”

“Yes I can see why she would think that,” Dotty continued, “But Bertie dear I am about to have a willy rammed up my front bottom for the very first time in an hour or so’s time, I am told first time is excruciatingly painful, I am ...