Next Chapter 3
Date: 6/17/2016,
Categories:
Fiction
Author: Michael.F
... heart exploded. And part of me, and I didn’t know how prevalent or how big it was…but it was still there…wanted to find a way to end it all… I needed to be calm. I needed to find a way to relax and let go of all this shit. To find that balance I needed. I couldn’t… My eyes slowly turned up to see Kayla looking at me with fear in her eyes. I didn’t blame her. With all that shit going on inside my body and in my head, I could only imagined what it looked like on the outside. Damn… “I’m sorry,” I said in a husky voice, still panting and fighting to get my emotions in check. It was a losing battle…but I was going to keep fighting. I had to. That thought…the one of ending it all…that scared me. As I fought to get control of myself, a ringing pierced my ears. I thought at first it was just my ears ringing from all the effort of trying to get myself under control until I realized it was coming from my pants. My phone. Jeez, I’d almost forgot I had it. Frankly, a lot of stuff I took for granted was suddenly seeming very foreign. If I had walked into my room at that moment, feeling as I did, I would have been as lost as if I had been on Mars. I scrambled over the my pants, my limbs still feeling like jelly, and managed to tug my ringing phone out of my pocket and click it open. “Hello?” I said in a voice that still wasn’t under control. “Jack?” A man’s voice. Familiar, but… “Yes?” “It’s Frank. From work?” Frank…from work…Work! “Oh, yeah, hi. Hey, Frank. What’s up?” “You okay, Jack?” ...
... No. Hell no. Fucking hell no. “Yeah. I guess…yeah, totally fine. Why?” “Well…where are you? You were supposed to be in half an hour ago.” A weight of bricks dumped into my stomach and I felt like slamming my fist through the wall. That’s right. I’d been given Monday and Tuesday off with the understanding that I’d help with the post-Christmas slam the day after. Great…Impeccable attendance record officially down the shitter. Lovely. Just one more stab to the gut. “Oh, yeah! Frank, I’m so sorry! I completely forgot. It’s just been…well, it’s been kinda nuts and a lot of stuff has been—” “Just hurry and get here, Jack. We’re dying.” “Yeah, absolutely! I’ll be over as soon as I can.” “Okay. Good.” “See ya.” I hung up, replacing the idea of putting my fist through the wall with putting my head through the wall. What a fucking wonderful day… “I’m so late,” I said out loud, not really sure if I was directing it at Kayla. “Sorry,” she replied, her voice free of emotion. I looked up at her, wanting to convey in a look everything I didn’t have time to say. “I’ll talk to you after work,” I said, “If you want me to call or come over or…” She thought about it while I struggled to dress myself quickly. “Well, our parents will be back so maybe we should wait?” The lack of anything other than crisp directness in her voice was chilling. I’d be less freaked out if she was actually screaming at me. “I mean, we should keep talking,” I said as I pulled my shirt over my head, “We need to. We’ll be ...