A Stepmother's Sin - Chapter 5: I try to understand what is motivating my stepson - Sex Stories

A Stepmother's Sin - Chapter 5: I try to understand what is motivating my stepson

... arrived at work, still aware of the very faint taste of Robert’s semen and uncertain what I should do, or what I could do with this emotionally and morally complicated mess in which I found myself. But my first step was to go to the ladies room to brush my teeth. As irrational as it might sound to you, I was fearful that the scent of Robert's semen might be detectable on my breath. I was paranoid that someone would somehow instinctively uncover the truth and discover the horrific act I was committing. Part of me kept questioning whether or not I was truly the monster that society would label me if they only knew. Mothers do not sleep with their stepsons, ever. But I had done just that. I did not fully understand how this all happened, although I felt very culpable. My childhood Catholic upbringing taught me plenty about guilt, as well as some about forgiveness. I was feeling an enormous burden of guilt, and I feared I could never be forgiven. I could revisit the events leading up to this moment, but to what end? Yes, I should not have invaded his privacy the night I saw him first masturbating. And yes, I should never agreed to our mutual masturbation session, that was totally over the line. And I should never have allowed him to touch and taste me. Each mistake led to another. But I do not know how I could have prevented last night; Robert was intent on having me, with or without my diaphragm in place. I knew then as I know now, it was far better to agree to insert my ...

... diaphragm and allow my stepson to enter me, than to try to resist and risk having him take me without protection. On the other hand, I was not a victim here. I did respond physically to Robert’s attentions, and I did respond emotionally as well. I responded in a profound and shattering manner. I should not have; I wish I had not, but I had. So what now? The important thing was doing what was best for Robert. He seems to have no problem with the current arrangement. He seems to have no pangs of guilt. I needed to think more; I needed to have a serious discussion with Robert. I also needed to understand better what was really going inside Robert’s head. Then I thought, I do not even understand what is going on inside my head! I was totally confused. Later that morning I called my ObGyn and got a prescription for birth control pills. I did not know what the future would hold, but it was clear that neither Robert nor I could be trusted to put these events in the past where they belong, and I knew that I did not have the physical or emotional strength to stop him from taking me whenever he chose. And I was not sure I could turn away from the pleasure my stepson gave me either. When I picked up the prescription over lunch, the pharmacist reminded me to use another form of birth control for at least seven days after starting to take the pill. Note to self, keep diaphragm in place whenever there was any risk or potential. Back in my office, I shut my door and sat silently, trying to sort ...