Young Cunts - Act One: Shall We Start With Cunts? - Sex Stories

Young Cunts - Act One: Shall We Start With Cunts?

It was the best of times; it was the worst of times. It was the age of headiness, of ambition, of imagination. It was the epoch of desire, indulgence and Pleasure. So it was in the season when the Enlightenment burst forth upon this Continent. After the pandemic, the migrant crises, the collapse of the world climate, and the wars of the early twenties, after the destruction of all we held dear, it would have been too easy for us to accept our reduced circumstances, to agree to fade into the background, to leave the battle of ideas to others – in other words, to accept that our time was past. But no, we did not do that. Instead, the genius of Europe rose again. Like Voltaire, like Locke, like Rousseau – we saw that a New Enlightenment was necessary, to sweep away the moral cobwebs that had kept us hidebound and oppressed for too long. We saw that the true destiny of mankind lay in Pleasure, pure Pleasure. And so let it remain. Long live the New Enlightenment!

- Emma Jane Cuntslicker, 2010-2060

“Seriously?!” The girl snorted, collapsing into a fit of giggles on the sofa. “The names! The names! Oh Grandma Alison, how on earth did anyone take themselves seriously in those days?” The young lady was short and slightly chubby, with brown skin, blue eyes, frizzy blond hair, and a small nose-ring in her left nostril. A cheeky smile lit up her freckled face.

“Oh, my darling, you have no idea,” replied the old lady, allowing herself to laugh too. “We all took ourselves very ...

... seriously indeed. It was an age of totalitarian liberalism, of compulsory Pleasure: we were changing the world, one fuck at a time! And Professor Cuntslicker was one of the greatest visionaries of the age: exceptional, in that she managed to balance devotion to her ideals with a true compassion for human beings. This was her last book: go on, you read some to me now,” she said, handing the open volume to her granddaughter. “Your eyes are better than mine.”

The girl took it, but paused. “Wait a moment,” she frowned. “‘2010-2060’? Does that mean…”

Her grandmother nodded grimly. “Yes… That’s what happened in those days. And just think, that was a mere ten years after your Grandad Rob and I, and your Great Aunt Eva, escaped. We were still living in the Outside World; your mummy was just a little girl then. I cried when I heard. You see, Cuntslicker was a selfless idealist, and brave beyond all measure. Ideologies fail, empires collapse; but out of their ruins there are always one or two truly wise, principled people we can learn from.”

“Tell me more about those times, Grandma Alison,” replied the girl softly.

“If you like,” the old lady smiled. “Shall we start with Cunts?”

“Start withwhat?” The girl looked appalled.

“No no, I mean Professor Cuntslicker – we all called her ‘Cunts’.”

The girl started to giggle uncontrollably.

“Now now, you must control yourself, darling, if you want me to tell you more. I mean, how must she have felt: 2060, at the pinnacle of ...