Matt and Jason Ch. 03 - Sex Stories

Matt and Jason Ch. 03

... lovey-dovey and gentle... I was all rough and tumble. It made me feel like a man. Like THE man. King of the World. When I was with you, it was totally different. And it totally fucked with my mind. I always thought gay sex was weak, girly... but what we did was the most fucking masculine, MANLY shit I did in my life. Like it was the first time I really knew what it meant to be a Man. Sharing raw, fucking primal power. We weren't just men, we were fucking GODS. I don't know about you, but I never felt so fucking alive in my life. I don't know what guys are 'supposed' to do, but this feels right. We're not lesser guys; this feels like what being a guy is supposed to be like."

Matt just stood there. Eyes locked on me. Transfixed. "Christ, Jason. Deep down, you're a regular philosopher, you know that?"

I snorted in contempt. We both stared ahead, silent. Finally, he asked the million-dollar question: "So, does this mean we're gay?"

"What do you think?"

A long, drawn-out pause. "I hate labels."

After a few minutes of heavy silence, Matt started to get philosophical himself. "Funny thing, I'm starting to realize how wrong I've been. About of lots of things. About what being 'gay' means. I'm with you... I guess I always thought gay sex was like... weak. Soft. Something guys would do as a piss-poor alternative to the real thing, for whatever reason. But that's the biggest bunch of bullshit ever. You're right: this has been, like, next level manliness." There was ...

... another very, very long pause. "I guess the bigger question is... are you good with all this? Whatever we're calling it? Like, you're not weirded out or anything?"

I set my drink back, and leaned back. Thinking for a moment. "Yeah, that's the question. I mean... when we're doing it, it's the best thing ever. But am I freaking out on the inside when we're done? Maybe. A little. But... well, that hasn't stopped me from wanting more."

I looked over at Matt, and he nodded in unspoken agreement. It felt like we were coming to that Moment of Truth. An open door in front of us. There are a million reasons why we should walk away. But... I've always been the kind of guy who goes in charging like a bull.

Well, why stand on ceremony? I turned to Matt and gave him a steely-eyed stare. "Look, maybe we're overthinking things. It's not like we're hurting anybody. I mean, no one even knows. They don't have to know. What I can say is that this has been fucking amazing. The best sex of my entire life. Like, you're flipping switches I didn't even know I had. I can't believe how fucking lucky I am. We don't have to be 'gay.' We don't have to be anything but ourselves. We can work it out as we go. But if you're up for keeping on, I'm totally in."

Matt just looked at me. With a sly sparkle in his eye. "Shit, Jason... you're not a philosopher; you're a fucking horndog. You know that?"

I snorted. "Well, if we're gonna be so concerned about guys' behavior... well, ALL guys are all a bunch ...