Dipper Ch. 01 - Sex Stories

Dipper Ch. 01

... lips and slowly press and pull back a few times, but I'll challenge you to try that at home and then try to tell me that it doesn't represent!

[Grip, press, suck, release, press, split puckered lips, suck, release and repeat until the hired farm hand helpers pass out]

See? The shape is perfect and so much better than a banana! Try it. Or ask your girlfriend for a demo.

Oh, but it is a rumor that I once used a couple of toothpicks to attach a ripe strawberry to the end of a banana, but it's a fact that you should not try that at home because it can be ouch, ouch dangerous! But I swear it, it represents. Or rumor would have it anyways.

Another rumor is more of a half and half situation. I'm not a yoga expert by any means, but I had an occasional issue at nighty night time with my legs and then I happened upon a yoga type muscle stretching solution online for fatigue and this one you can actually try at home because all it does is stretch your leg and thigh muscles out in a different way than normal daily activity does. Just lay flat on your back and place the bottom of your feet together and pull forward to create a diamond and then slowly, but surely, keep pulling your feet up towards your crotch and pass through the diamond shape and then into a triangle shape and then into a crashed triangle shape and hold as long as you can or feel comfortable with and repeat a few times. That's the truth. The rumor is that I gave Jason personalized instructions, which I ...

... actually did, but I did not then massage his inner thighs as he held the crashed triangle. I mean, I totally did that, but my hands did not graze where they shouldn't have grazed and I swear it, my massaging hands stayed center thigh!

LOL, it is so not a rumor that guys can launch off with just proximity massaging. It's also so not a rumor that the real thing is so much more alive and vibrant than a strawberry tooth picked to the end of a banana! I mean, it was all "bounce, throb, swing, bounce, argh, throb, throb, aha, aha, massage harder, argh, bounce, bounce, swing, sway, please, flip, flop, OMG, we've come this far, boing, boing, boing, OMG, OMG, Dipper, the strawberry rumors are true, aha, aha, aha, ooh, ooh, ahh, ahh" and stuff, right?

Well, I'm telling you, you can call it a mushroom all day, but it still splits a set of puckered and pursed lips like a pyramid shaped strawberry and that's a fact.

Anyways, enough of the silliness that is generated from the rumor mills for now since I haven't properly described myself yet. I may do my part to save the world's Denim supply from time to time, but mostly in public, I keep things neat and tidy. I love my warmup suits because I love fashion that perfectly matches and I love how underneath things can be a totally different world and I love how some people have been rumored to place bets on just how "night & day" I might be on any given night out. But we all know that most regular people won't challenge a trans person in ...