I'm So Lonesome I Could Cry - Sex Stories

I'm So Lonesome I Could Cry

There is a common fiction many of us adhere to which goes something like this: When you find the person that you've always desired, then you will be happy. My experience and that of many of the people I know is that this is indeed a falsehood. We may be happy for a period of time, but we bring ourselves into the relationship and no one is perfect. Therefore, there is a strong likelihood that after an initial honeymoon, we will be disillusioned. And yet, we choose to believe this myth when times are hard. It can be the light at the end of a long and dark tunnel.

The best case in these experiences is that we are grateful for the person we have found and learn to accept the imperfections that come along with the relationship. The worst-case scenario is that the disappointments build up and we begin wanting something more and revert to compensating behaviors.

It has been just over two years since Josh's auspicious encounter with Samantha when he came to her house to install a light fixture. For the first year, he was in awe of how fortunate he was to have met her. They seemed so well matched and time together was passionate and exciting. They made special efforts to surprise one another to keep things fresh. Their sex life was, in equal measure, adventurous and respectful. They enjoyed long hours exploring one another's body and bringing each other to multiple orgasms. He would say that there was nothing more he could want in a partner, and it was so obvious that Samantha ...

... was in love with him. One significant change for him was his growing confidence that he could remain sober.

She had insisted on only one stipulation when they agreed to move in together. It was that he had to stay sober. She would support him in his battle, she told him, but falling off the wagon would mean at least a temporary end to their relationship. Being in recovery herself, she needed the safety that his sobriety would afford her.

After that first year, Samantha had taken a new job that demanded a lot of her time and energy. It was a job she loved and, for the first time, she felt she was contributing meaningfully to a project that was close to her heart. It did mean that she was not as available, physically or emotionally, to Josh because she was sometimes tired or distracted by the demands on her. She also traveled some weekends.

If Josh could have been honest with himself, and Samantha, he would have admitted to his feelings of jealousy and being neglected, which her new job provoked in him. But he had never been all that self-aware. His pattern was to push through discomfort and dismiss the early warning signs. If he had some better communication skills, he could have shared with her his feelings and they would have worked them through. But again, good communication was not an 'arrow in his quiver' as Samantha had once pointed out. The trouble with not being in touch with your feelings and not being able to communicate them is that your partner is left in ...