1. Once a Nerd Ch. 12


    Date: 12/2/2023, Categories: Gay Male, Author: byhardwoodstudios 

    ... dismemberment?"

See?Smartass.

"I need her tolike me."

John pins me with a dry, unamused stare. "Why would shelike you?"

"Wha—? What's not to fuckin' like?"

"I mean to say, shespecifically has no reason to like you."

I scowl at him, because while I know he has the ability to be helpful, he's going out of his way not to be. "I make Sam happy. That's reason enough, isn't it?"

John opens his mouth, then closes it. He looks a mix between thoughtful and exasperated. "I mean, you do seem to make him happy, but is that really enough? You don't know anything about her, so it's hard to tell if she'd be satisfied with that. Ignoring everything else, she might not even know he's gay."

"She does."

"Hm." John hums, stretching his legs out under the desk. "So, let's address the second biggest concern: your age and that you used to be Sam's student. Both of those things make him look bad."

The temporary truth of that will never cease to piss me off. "Right." I grunt, resuming my incessant flicking of the lanyard—just to irritate John. He does that slow, pained blink again, so I know it's working.

"Then, why not just be honest with her?"

I roll my head to look at him. "Honest how?"

It becomes clear John waswaiting for this moment, because he's suddenly working his expression and tone like I'm an audience of one at his improv show. Except, he's pretending to be me, and he's being a real dick about it:

"Hello, Ms. Powell, my name's Dean Saunders. You ...
    ... might know me as...Fresno's rising star? ESPN wouldn't shut the fuck up about me last week? Yeah, pretty impressive shit. Anyway, earlier this year, I twisted your son's arm into engaging in a sexual relationship with me, his eighteen-year-old student, even though he wasjust trying to do his job. Then, I followed him across the country without having any kind of a meaningful discussion about it, andsomehow, I bullied him into loving me. I'd like your blessing, please."

Christ, why did Itell him any of that?

"I didn'tbully him into loving me." I huff. "I'm...lovable, you shitlick."

"Oh, and I'm also probably a raging narcissist. Or a sociopath, maybe. So, about that blessing—"

"You arebegging for a swirly right now—"

John breaks character to laugh at the blunt cliché. I snort to myself, turning back to the ceiling. Whether I went about it the right way or not, I'm happy with how it's going. It's Wednesday now, and the previous weekend was a dream. Spending the night with Sam was...

I missed itso much. We fucked ourselves half to death, yeah, but everything else—getting to hold him while I slept, waking up to him, taking meals together, traipsing around Berkeley on an impromptu day-date. If Sam was at all bogged down by guilt or reservation, I couldn't tell. He wasglowing. Happy, relaxed. God, it was good, and it killed me to leave. Every Monday through Friday feels like its own century, dragging my way through another hundred years until I can see him again. ...
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